zombie meme

Friday, June 22nd, 2007 | zombies

I have been Zombie Tagged, by Ginquinn to celebrate the young Mr Burt’s birthday. By a stroke of sheer coincidence I put in an order at Threadless about two weeks ago, and what should be in that order? Well I’ll tell you what – an “In case of zombies” t-shirt which quite frankly gives me answers a plenty on how to survive a zombie invasion. How handy is that? So without further ado:

1. Describe your zombie escape plan (generally). Explain your choices.

Well on another stroke of coincidence I was discussing zombie escape plans up in Leeds recently. Corner shops with their own generators seemed a good idea at the time, but since then I’ve come to a different conclusion. Somewhere with only one door, a long hallway and some stairs. That seems the best idea. You see, zombies a) arn’t very clever and b) you can only fit one through the door at any time. So they’re likely to form a nice queue, whilst lots of well-armed people can line the hallway and safely dispose of them. Of course, if it gets too much you just climb the stairs. After all zombies can’t climb stairs and certainly don’t have any ridiculous dalek type hover skills.

2. Who would you choose to have with you and why?

Strong men. This is for two reasons a) strong men are always handy to have around. I rather like them. And b) strong men are strong and therefore very good at killing zombies. I thought everyone knew that?

3. What is your choice of zombie bashing weapon?

Well obviously a cricket bat. They’re great! In fact, my t-shirt helpfully says “sporting goods can be handy in a panic”. But I’d like some big guns too – just to look cool.

4. Finally if you escape plan goes horribly wrong what will you do?

Sack all the strong men for a start! But fortunately here my t-shirt comes up with some helpful hints: “zombies are slow and dim-witted. It may be possible to move amongst them undetected”. So I’d try that for a while and if all else fails, I’ll die or become zombificated. Mmmmm brains……

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